Selling Manhattan By The Pound
Elizabeth Spiers took part in a reading the other night and chose a passage from a non-fiction piece she contributed to a book anthology, Bookmark Now. (Out this summer?) It's called "Andrew Krucoff And The Amazing Paper Weblog." After you spit out your coffee, double-over in mocking laughter, or shake your head in disgust, I can assure you this book is headed straight for the bargain bins and will most likely be available on tables along Avenue A amongst stacks of Playboy and Science Annuals from the 70's. Originally destined for New York magazine (I'm guessing the naming of the Faustian character "Andrew Krucoff" is what killed it, she should have used "Milo Aukerman"), it's the story of how Chris Gage and I turned my blog The Other Page into a print zine. Hold onto your hats everyone -- there are flying pigs, nasty knuckleballs, inter-denominational couples fucking like dust bunnies, and an awesome fight scene in it. I didn't go to the reading or hear how it went but I'll be really disappointed if Elizabeth didn't at least have a Chinese boy lighting firecrackers around her during the performance. Anyway, the next issue of The Other Page is coming out soon. Top-shelf contributors make this baby float on water and do ollies over park benches. As a preview I offer the worst of the bunch, the beginning of a piece I did on Genesis and prog rock:
War Hero's Intromominem: French horns, mellotron, and the sound of horses falling through a hole in the sky.
"But man, when was the last time I thought about those earthy minstrels Gryphon or the sweet ax chops of Steve Morris' from the Dixie Dregs. It was a sad day in my basement, huddled over my Peavy 60-watt, cradling my SG, when I found out Rod Morgenstein, the drummer, had joined Winger." -Chris Gage after perusing ProgArchives
Part I. Boy Hoards Bottle Stored With Time. (Drums, keyboards, alternating yellow and orange lights duel until time explodes like an egg in a microwave.)
I've been experiencing a flurry of Genesis (the band) activity lately, no substantial accumulation but it has left a dusting of confusion if not complete indifference. Admittedly, I'm not a huge fan but there's sentimental value since Genesis is the answer to the question we carry around our whole lives: What was your first concert? (How fitting.) It was 1982 at the Merriweather Post Pavillion in Columbia, MD. Due to being 11 years old at the time, I only have three distinct memories from the night:
(snare)
a. They played the song Abacab. I probably remember it cause that was the title song of the album and I wanted to recognize at least one. But now that I give it deeper thought there are traces of Turn It On Again, No Reply At All, and Lonely Man On The Corner. Shit, what do I know? I was so high! No no, my oldest brother Peter would wait another two years before passing that baton of youth to me. I guess he figured I had to be a genuine teenager.
(crash)
b. I did get a preview though. I can clearly picture two guys on the blanket next to us smoking and I remarked to my middle brother Jason, "Look how close that guy is lighting a cigarette to his face, he's gonna burn himself."
(gong)
c. Phil Collins told a story (or a joke?) about being tied to the steering wheel of a car and fucking. I think I'm actually gonna have to roam prog message boards to get that night's bootleg. Besides the obvious golden opportunity of owning the soundtrack to my first concert, I really have to get that story straight.
Part I-i. Web-footed Monkeys Stop For Lunch.
Note: I tried to fact-check with Jason but his memory isn't much better as he's only 2 years older than me. He offers: "I more vividly remember sitting in our room with Kevin Mumma and saying that we could do a Genesis video to "Turn It On Again"....something about the window sill, the bed...."
Thrilling, huh? The rest of it includes a bold (and only slightly disingenuous) defense of prog rock. I also go into some stuff about punk and other shit. Be on the look out, we're gonna throw a party for the release with Spock's Beard.
War Hero's Intromominem: French horns, mellotron, and the sound of horses falling through a hole in the sky.
"But man, when was the last time I thought about those earthy minstrels Gryphon or the sweet ax chops of Steve Morris' from the Dixie Dregs. It was a sad day in my basement, huddled over my Peavy 60-watt, cradling my SG, when I found out Rod Morgenstein, the drummer, had joined Winger." -Chris Gage after perusing ProgArchives
Part I. Boy Hoards Bottle Stored With Time. (Drums, keyboards, alternating yellow and orange lights duel until time explodes like an egg in a microwave.)
I've been experiencing a flurry of Genesis (the band) activity lately, no substantial accumulation but it has left a dusting of confusion if not complete indifference. Admittedly, I'm not a huge fan but there's sentimental value since Genesis is the answer to the question we carry around our whole lives: What was your first concert? (How fitting.) It was 1982 at the Merriweather Post Pavillion in Columbia, MD. Due to being 11 years old at the time, I only have three distinct memories from the night:
(snare)
a. They played the song Abacab. I probably remember it cause that was the title song of the album and I wanted to recognize at least one. But now that I give it deeper thought there are traces of Turn It On Again, No Reply At All, and Lonely Man On The Corner. Shit, what do I know? I was so high! No no, my oldest brother Peter would wait another two years before passing that baton of youth to me. I guess he figured I had to be a genuine teenager.
(crash)
b. I did get a preview though. I can clearly picture two guys on the blanket next to us smoking and I remarked to my middle brother Jason, "Look how close that guy is lighting a cigarette to his face, he's gonna burn himself."
(gong)
c. Phil Collins told a story (or a joke?) about being tied to the steering wheel of a car and fucking. I think I'm actually gonna have to roam prog message boards to get that night's bootleg. Besides the obvious golden opportunity of owning the soundtrack to my first concert, I really have to get that story straight.
Part I-i. Web-footed Monkeys Stop For Lunch.
Note: I tried to fact-check with Jason but his memory isn't much better as he's only 2 years older than me. He offers: "I more vividly remember sitting in our room with Kevin Mumma and saying that we could do a Genesis video to "Turn It On Again"....something about the window sill, the bed...."
Thrilling, huh? The rest of it includes a bold (and only slightly disingenuous) defense of prog rock. I also go into some stuff about punk and other shit. Be on the look out, we're gonna throw a party for the release with Spock's Beard.
