The Shafer-Dylan Clearing The Air Act

Jack Shafer, you get a big HY!™ for most correctly pointing out that the Forbes "Fish don't fry in the kitchen, Beans don't burn on the grill" Controversy has been blown so out of proportion that Carly Fiorina needs reconstructive knee surgery. The focus of the piece was gender-neutral and if anyone can't see that past the hand-cranked headline, well then, I've got a bridge with Janet Reno's dick on it I'd like to sell you.

When the gun smoke clears and magnifying mirrors returned to their purses, it will be obvious what really ruins marriages: a wedding, family, friends, co-habitation, reproduction, and the general legality of it all. The article wasn't misogynistic as much as it was classist. It seemed to say more than anything that marriage is for poor people because they have nothing to lose. Which is true, and funny, when you think about it. No? Think harder.

You know who else solders H to the Y? Mr. Bob "My Morning Facial Hair Sounds Better Than Your Band" Dylan, that's who. When he flicked aside the last 20 years of music with less concern than a Motley Crue groupie after her turn in the shower, it wasn't a case of invective marketing designed to promote his latest album ("as if!" said the tambourinist) but rather the Echo of Truth barreling down a mountain, picking off tree dwellers and soil-robbers by the thousands.

But listen closely, an exception emerges when the Echo comes to rest at the base of 1992 in Annapolis, MD. Ladies and Gentrifiers, please roll up your sleeves and throw rocks at beat cops, it's The Shit!