The Bible Rewrite Project

Isn't it a nice idea? Animal parts grow from the trees and from flowers (pictured above is the heart blossom) and you can just pluck them whenever and wherever you want and sew them together and this is the most Holy activity known to man and you become more like God and Godly by making these animals and using the parts that He made grow from the flowers for you because He wants you to be like Him.

And now back to The Bible Rewrite Project...

NOTE: Original Text appears in Italics. Rewrite follows in Plain Text.

Genesis 2

Thus the heavens and the earth were finished, and all the host of them. And on the seventh day God ended His work which He had made; and He rested on the seventh day from all His work which He had made. And God blessed the seventh day and sanctified it, because in it He had rested from all His work which God created and made.

So the heavens and the earth were completed, and all that is in them. On the seventh day Nate ended His work which He had done. And He rested on the seventh day from all His work. Then Nate honored the seventh day and made it holy, because in it He rested from all His work which He had done.

The Garden Of Eden

These are the generations of the heavens and of the earth when they were created, in the day that the LORD God made the earth and the heavens, and before every plant of the field was in the earth, and before every herb of the field grew; for the LORD God had not caused it to rain upon the earth, and there was not a man to till the ground. But there went up a mist from the earth, and watered the whole face of the ground. And the LORD God formed man of the dust of the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living soul. And the LORD God planted a garden eastward in Eden, and there He put the man whom He had formed. And out of the ground made the LORD God to grow every tree that is pleasant to the sight and good for food, the tree of life also in the midst of the garden, and the tree of knowledge of good and evil.

The Garden Of Eden

This is the story of the heavens and the earth when they were made, in the day Nate made the earth and the heavens. Now no bush of the field was yet on the earth. No limbs were growing from the earth. For Nate had not sent rain upon the earth. Man did not exist. But a fog came from the earth and watered the whole top of the ground. And the first green plant was born. And as it flowered, over time, out sprouted the brain of man between the petals. And from a tree trunk nearby, came two arms and two legs. Nate took these pieces, along with parts he already had, and with His hands sewed together the first human being. Then He breathed into his mouth the breath of life. Man became a living being. Nate planted a garden to the east in Eden. He put the man there whom He had made. And Nate made every tree that is pleasing to the eyes and good to grow animal parts in this garden. He made the tree of life grow in the center of the garden. This, the tree of the knowledge of good and evil.

And a river went out of Eden to water the garden, and from thence it was parted and became four heads. The name of the first is Pishon; that is it which compasseth the whole land of Havilah, where there is gold. And the gold of that land is good, and there is bdellium and the onyx stone. And the name of the second river is Gihon; the same is it that compasseth the whole land of Cush. And the name of the third river is Hiddekel; that is it which goeth toward the east of Assyria. And the fourth river is Euphrates.

Now a river flowed out of Eden to water the garden. And from there it divided and became four rivers. The name of the first is Pishon. It flows around the whole land of Havilah, where there is gold. The gold of that land is good. Bdellium and onyx stone are there. The name of the second river is Gihon. It flows around the whole land of Cush. The name of the third river is Tigris. It flows east of Assyria. And the fourth river is the Euphrates.

And the LORD God took the man and put him into the Garden of Eden to dress it and to keep it. And the LORD God commanded the man, saying, "Of every tree of the garden thou mayest freely eat; but of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, thou shalt not eat of it. For in the day that thou eatest thereof, thou shalt surely die." Then Nate took the man and put him in the garden of Eden to live, explore the possibilities of creation, and make new animals. Nate told the man, "You are free to use any of the animal parts that grow from the plants and trees in the garden to create your animals. But do not sew animal parts from the tree of knowledge of good and evil to your own body. For the day you sew these parts to your own body is the day you die. And the LORD God said, "It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper meet for him." And out of the ground the LORD God formed every beast of the field, and every fowl of the air, and brought them unto Adam to see what he would call them; and whatsoever Adam called every living creature, that was the name thereof. And Adam gave names to all cattle, and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field; but for Adam there was not found a helper meet for him. And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept; and He took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof. And the rib which the LORD God had taken from man, made He a woman and brought her unto the man. And Adam said, "This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man." Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife; and they shall be one flesh. And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.

Then Nate said, "It is not good for man to be alone. I will make a helper that is right for him." Out of the animal parts and pieces scattered in the trees, Nate sewed every animal of the field and every bird of the sky. He brought them to the man to find out what he would call them. And whatever the man called a living thing, that became its name. Adam gave names to all the cattle, and to the birds of the sky, and to every animal of the field. But there was no helper found that was right for him. Nate asked Adam, “Would you not like to make your companion yourself?” Adam said that he would try. He asked Nate, “Is there a way I can grow my own body parts from me? From my own body?” Nate said, “I can help you with that.” So Nate caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam. And while he was sleeping, Nate made two more legs and two more arms (among other organs) erupt from Adam’s body. Adam awoke and sewed together the very parts which were taken from his own body. The man said, "This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh. She will be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man." For this reason a man will leave his father and his mother, and will be joined to his wife. And they will become one flesh. The man and his wife were both without clothes but were not ashamed.