I can't really feel or dream down here

The YM team has needed a kick in the ass (or perhaps just an ass-kicking) more than the highly improbable Derek Powazek, and this post by 99 did the trick. At his own expense, Krucoff chartered an El Al 757 to fly the entire staff to an undisclosed location at the exact center between the residences of Jason Calcanis and Nick Denton. I believe that puts us somewhere near the Mariana Trench, which would explain the need for a bathysphere and helium tanks, and also the squeaky voices; although Krucoff’s voice sounds pretty much like I remember it in the nightmares I have every night. My God. He’s unaffected by helium. What other entry on the periodic table of elements has no effect on him? Maybe it's a Jew thing. But then, what isn't?

Anyway, as the picture shows, we are shirtless and shackled together, almost 10,000 metres below the see in a dank room illuminated by a single bare bulb. The gas masks bring us a sweet, sweet mixture of oxygen and helium, while also limiting our peripheral vision which allows us to focus on blogging. From the picture, even I can’t tell who is who, but after about 17 hours in this room with no food or sleep, our consciousnesses start to blend together and things like identity and duality no longer matter. We are a hive-mind. A single entity connected for one purpose: to bring you top-notch blog content. Starting right after this post…

Value of this post: the cost of a 34 word text message from Rachel Sklar, or, dinner for one at Nate’s house, depending on your wireless plan.