Cash in now, honey

Krucoff tells me that I need to say something about this weekend's Creativity Now conference and that maybe he can weasel us some tickets. Actually, he was supposed to weasel us some tickets a month ago and he never did.

Setting: YM Staff Meeting
Krucoff: So I got this email about the Creativity Now conference. Anyone want to field it?

99: Go shit in your hat.

Me: I've been twice already. It should be renamed Creative Professionals with Castro Hats and Japanese Girlfriends Conference.

Curt: I don't care what anyone says, I think it sounds cool.

Me: Like I said, I've been twice and had a decent time. One year I saw Matthew Barney, or a lifelike automaton of him. I witnessed Shepard Fairey (or was it Ryan McGinnis? Or Ryan McGinley? Who can tell?) excoriate one of the other panelists for being all rah-rah about the conference's corporate sponsorship (I believe that year it was Nike, or Tylenol?). I was impressed by Ed Templeton's intelligence and his wife's amazing rack. Another time I sat through a painful presentation by Ray Pettibon, one of my punk rock heroes, but afterward he signed my book, so that was cool. I laughed out loud when Vice magazine's third-asshole-in-charge asserted that they had a shred of credibility because they don't accept cigarette ads.

These remembrances blur together because I'm generally drunk at events such as these (what else are you supposed to do about those Cooper Union chairs? They are really fucking uncomfortable; were they built for a monastery or something?) but I know this for a fact: It's kind of interesting to listen to a genius like, say, Peter Saville* and a mongoloid like, say, Asia Argento in the space of 15 minutes. (Question: Is Carlo McCormick going to be the moderator this year? He bores me.)

So there you go, Krucoff. There's your pre-conference coverage. Gimme those fucking tickets.

Blatz, Fuck New York

*I'm sure 99 will want to weigh in on this assertion--he's the daginer, after all.