It's Like A Tickertape, But With Bricks

Shit's true: YM and the YM Tumblr have multiple contributors, most of whom tend to blame one another when asked if something that went up is theirs (my tip: if it's indignant, it's Nic, if it's self-righteous, it's Andrew, and if it's intentionally bad, that's me). Well, to the nine people reading this, you've now got someone else to blame for our shit: meet the newest contributor to YM, Bakes.

When the Dramaspora was still in full force, two secret guest-bloggers were invited to contribute, one by Andrew, the other by me. I brought Bakes on because there's too much penis up in this motherfucker, and I can only handle the snausages-fest for so long before my propensity for extended dialogues about Glenn Danzig and "fuck the po-lice" reaches its breaking point. I broke the news to The Boss about three weeks after she had been on board - he called my slipping her the login "just violating enough," which is an incredible compliment around here. Violating the Boss is something you only get to do once every Full Moon over San Loco. She's done nothing but great things since then, and she's a sneaky one. I can't tell you how many times I've emailed Andrew or Bakes asking which one of them wrote a particular item on any given day. Yes, it's true: we aim to confuse, and she's captured the spirit of that in a manner befitting someone I delight in having around, when I can tell it's her.

Bakes hails from one of the Whitest Places in America, and it confuses her when I talk about "that rapper music." She knows a lot about money and shit, and bars like Dorian's that we'd never be caught dead in before but can now venture into with a certified safari guide; i.e. places that are both the hive of some of the biggest assholes in New York and a locale further up our own asses then ever previously spelunked. Best of all, Katie's a good fit for us as evidenced by a conversation we once had in which we discussed the nature of her birthday party, filled with both three-piece business types and bloggers. We were discussing the disparities in that way in which we discuss things, and Katie astutely noted: "You guys are far more judgmental of them than they would ever be of you!"

"Of course!" Andrew and I simultaneously exclaimed.

The fact that she's still around means she is definitely one of us. Welcome to the shit, soldier.